I Wish
by AnelZac
Summary: "I miss you. Why won't you answer my letters?" AU.


Hello Arthur

It's been a long time, huh? I don't know if you still think about me, but I need to tell you something.

I really, really, really miss you.

But I don't think you'll say you miss me too. You won't talk to me again.

_Alfred bit his lips to hold back the tears. He didn't want to cry again, if he did, his tears would stain the paper._

Remember how we met? I do, it's not easy to forget the day you find the person you'll fall in love with.

_"Sorry, dude!" Alfred said. How did he hit someone while riding his bike? He had made sure before there wasn't anyone he could run over. Yet, he still did it. He helped the other boy to get back to his feet. Alfred observed they were the same age, or so it seemed. The other boy was blond, too, only a different shade. And his eyes were green. Once he had stood up, Alfred realised the other was shorter than him._

_"Please, do me and everyone else a favor, and next time look where you're going." He sounded pretty upset despite the apparently calm words, and Alfred could tell he was british from his accent. In order to avoid any kind of problem, Alfred insisted to make it up to him, it didn't matter how, he'd do it. Alfred learned that the boy's name was Arthur. 'What an interesting name', he thought. The became friends after that._

You'd totally yell at me if you were here!

Or you would just ignore me.

_A small smile appeared in Alfred's face due to the short memory of how Arthur used to react._

I wish you answered my letters.

_Alfred wished Arthur wrote back._

I miss your voice. I, strangely enough, miss fighting with you. I miss hugging you, Arthur. I miss your laughter. I miss talking to you. I miss kissing you.

If only you answered me back.

_A tear fell down his face and fell on the paper. It always made him cry to write the letters he knew Arthur wouldn't answer, but refused to stop doing it, he didn't want to stop talking to him, even if it was one-sided._

Sometimes, I sit in the backyard and I like to remember all those moments we spent together. Mattie says I've become a lot more serious than before, he also says I should laugh as often as I used to do. It's hard to do that since you left, you know?

_Matthew had supported his brother since Arthur left. He knew how much Alfred had grown to love him and how much it hurt him. However, there was nothing he could do about it except making sure Alfred was fine._

I think of you everyday. Sometimes, I can't sleep because of that.

_He had to cry himself to sleep when that happened. It didn't happen now as often as the first nights. But it still hurt the same._

I want you to answer.

_Another tear fell. Alfred tried not to sob. He didn't want to do it again._

I wish I could talk to you when I'm having a bad day. You were the only one to understand me, and you holding me was comforting. I remember when you baked a cake for me on my birthday, the candies you made were always so tasty!

_"Happy birthday, dear." Arthur uncovered Alfred's eyes and showed him the cake. Maybe Arthur was usually bad at cooking, but he never failed when it came to anything sweet. He'd always bake something for Alfred, whether it was a cake or cupcakes, Alfred loved it the same._

I also miss cuddling with you. And holding your hand.

_Alfred would hold Arthur's hand as much as possible, and they cuddled almost every night, specially after watching a horror movie. _

_"Stop watching them if you're scared."_

_"I'm not scared!" Of course, Alfred was aware his boyfriend knew he was lying, but never said anything and just let him be. _

_"Suit yourself, then."_

Hell, I miss YOU.

Why won't you answer back?

Just a word, a single word would be enough. I want to hear you saying you love me again.

_Arthur had been the first one to say 'I love you'. They had walked around when suddenly, he stood in front of the taller blond and without looking at him in the eye due to his embarrassment, the word left his mouth._

_"I love you." Arthur blushed. Alfred blushed as well but, nevertheless, he hugged Arthur and whispered in his ear:_

_"I love you too." It was the first of many exchanges of those words that would take place later but, for Alfred, it had been beautiful._

Please, answer back.

_'Anything. Any word you want to say, I just want to hear you again.'_

Please.

_'Please, only once more.'_

Please.

_He knew there was no use, it would not happen. But he still begged._

Please, come back.

_What could Alfred do to make his Arthur come back to him? Nothing._

Still loves you, Alfred.

_After all, he still loved Arthur as much as the first time he had said it._

* * *

Alfred put the letter in the envelope and closed it. He sighed, if only Arthur was there, he wouldn't feel that miserable. His only wish was to be with him again. He remembered with plenty of detail last time he had seen Arthur. Last time they had kissed.

_"Goodnight."_

_"Goodnight." A small peck to the lips, only to make sure the other could sleep peacefully._

The last words said to each other.

_"I'm leaving." _

_"Alright." With his boss being on vacation, Alfred didn't have to work that day. Arthur, however, had to do it. And as much as they both despised the idea, it was necessary._

_"I'll be back as soon as I can."_

Why did it have to rain that day?

Alfred made sure to lock the door. Once he did, he started walking. They weather didn't match his mood, it was a sunny day,

He missed Arthur. He really, really did.

Alfred hoped Arthur was happy wherever he was and he was taking care of himself. Every year he wrote a letter to his love. Every year he received no response. Sometimes, he even wished he had never met Arthur.

He stopped when he reached the one he was looking for. The place was lonely, his dear Arthur didn't have many friends. Alfred left the letter in front of the tombstone and said out loud:

"I wish I had said to you how much I really love you."

* * *

_A/N: I apologise for any mistake with grammar or spelling, since English is not my first language. _

_This is an idea I've had since Christmas Eve (I'm pure joy) and well, I wrote in a notebook sometime around January, but I hadn't edited and stuff until now (when I'm supposed to study for my exam). And well, I hope you enjoyed it._


End file.
